Greater love, hath no man than this

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"No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends." (John 15:13)

We have already discussed the call to love as Christ has loved and how God loves sinners. Our topic, i.e., this verse, builds on such concepts but in a way surpasses them. It is fascinating that Christ asks His broken-sinner followers to not only imitate His love but also clarify that with a romantic description of the greatest love possible. The truth is man was made for a kind of love he seems to find himself incapable of without Christ. Even Mother Teresa has said, "Love has to suffer to be real". The love described here involves seeing others as more important than oneself and at times may truly require its literal application.

First, let us consider what it means to consider the lives of others as more important than oneself. We can rarely express the greatest possible love in a literal and ultimate fashion as Christ dying on the cross after a romantic, candle-lit, sacramental dinner with His beloved (which became the sacrament of sacraments since it makes present the Body and Blood of Christ in the gift of His flesh upon the cross if the successors of those who first received the command to "do this" do in fact do it). In analogical fashion, we do express this form of love when we lay aside our to-do-list priorities to spend time with a friend, do the dishes for a roommate for a roommate, or go the extra mile to make a spouse clearly show love. In these examples, we find an echo of Proverbs 3:27 (Philippians 2:3-4).[1] This analogical case concerns the priority of the other's good/needs/desires before one's own and although our contemporaries may find this action to be backward thinking, indeed, we do not know ourselves until we give ourselves for the eternal and present good of others.[2] This is because our emotional, physiological, psychological, intellectual, and spiritual frameworks have the reception and giving of this love at its core.[3] Sometimes in this life, we must give much so that we may receive love like this from another human, and one must be very careful about judging whether someone is capable of returning this love because they must know and love Christ to reflect this love.[4] Love is always worth giving regardless of return but we are finite and our gift of life is worth giving to someone who can make a communion of the deepest sort as a result of loving like this. If they return this love in truth and depth, then one can know such a gift is not wasted and that it is worth continuing to give it in this way.[5] We should not offer ourselves in this way, according to that same logic, unless we can receive God's love in such a way unless we can consistently reflect the love of Christ and see that we do from the effect of our highest organic love we can offer with simplicity and clarity (in the ways we can/is prudent). Bible verse after bible verse is available on this in a framework for discerning this cited here.[6] In any case, (from personal experience) as a Christian your concern should not be for your own good, Christ and those who love you back should supply for this at least where it counts most, your concern should be that others have this. Love with all you have, receive God's love like your life depends on it, and be not afraid of choosing others even as much or more than yourself.

Second, often in marriage/parenthood/family life, priesthood, and religious life we literally have to understand our sacrifice for the good of those we promised to love as at least equivalent without our good. Love does mess things up sometimes, but we must understand this as how it ought to be, and that whatever is messed up needed to be messed up because such is how the providence of God is most effective and brings us eternal life. Sometimes discipleship may even require/imply an opportunity for a sacrifice such as when the other person is struggling. These situations are fewer and further between than with a vocation, but they are an opportunity to question whether are you being led by what you think is best for yourself or for others in a given moment. This question of what is most important to you is one which life in Christ necessarily brings you to do. Do you believe that love is the ultimate importance in life or is there something else that lingers in the top priority space?

In conclusion, love is the one thing Christ asks of us. Every other commandment, Christ gives is naturally expressed by means of this primary command. Christ insists that His followers not settle for tolerance when love is possible, and not even convenient love but inconvenient love. Sometimes the perpetual prioritization of the action of love and fostering communion, which should occupy every aspect of a Christian life, does take something and does cost something. We are broken people who have sins and naturally love always as best we can so that we may love better, will reveal to us, often inconveniently, how our sins or maligned priorities are getting in the way of our love. This presents to us in yet another inconvenient fashion, the question of whether we are more interested in implementing God's vision for our life or our vision with some-Jesus-on-the-side? If we choose Jesus to be on the sideline of our life rather than in everything, do we actually choose Jesus or just His gifts?[7] Do we love God (as someone who gave His life for us) with our lives or only with our word? What about those whom He loves, do we love them as Christ does?

Written by Carter Carruthers

FN:

  1. Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2nd ed. (Washington, DC: United States Catholic Conference, 2000), 2447.
  2. Second Vatican Council, Dogmatic Constitution on the Church in the Modern World _Gaudium et spes_ (7 December 1965), §24.
  3. Carter Carruthers,“Life in Christ Session 3,” Vivat Agnus Dei, last updated 26 September 2024.
  4. Carter Carruthers, "Judgement", Vivat Agnus Dei, July 30, 2023. and Carter Carruthers,“Series on Love,” Vivat Agnus Dei, last updated 27 October 2024.
  5. Ibid.
  6. Carter Carruthers,“Series on Love,” Vivat Agnus Dei, last updated 27 October 2024.
  7. Carter Carruthers, "The Giver, not the Gifts", Vivat Agnus Dei, November 28, 2021.

I am a created entity, not a person.

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